The Disaster Channel

http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/flooding-devastates-villages-in-china/64q93lv?src=v5:share:v5:share:permalink::&from=sharepermalink-v5:share:permalink:

'Jackass' star Ryan Dunn killed in car crash - CNN.com

2011-06-20T15:15:00.002-07:00

'Jackass' star Ryan Dunn killed in car crash - CNN.com

2011-06-20T15:15:00.001-07:00

'Jackass' star Ryan Dunn killed in car crash - CNN.com

2011-06-20T15:15:00.000-07:00

'Jackass' star Ryan Dunn killed in car crash - CNN.com

Toll Roads, Bridges Targeted for Major Fare Hikes - FoxNews.com

2011-06-19T19:37:00.000-07:00

Toll Roads, Bridges Targeted for Major Fare Hikes - FoxNews.com

NATO Admits to 9 Civilian Deaths in Libyan Airstrike - FoxNews.com

2011-06-19T18:57:00.000-07:00

NATO Admits to 9 Civilian Deaths in Libyan Airstrike - FoxNews.com

Japan to open airlock at crippled nuclear plant - CNN.com

2011-06-19T18:54:00.000-07:00

Japan to open airlock at crippled nuclear plant - CNN.com

Japan : May Exports were a DISASTER

2011-06-19T18:39:00.000-07:00

Japanese Exports in May were down around 10%. This hit harder than the 8% drop that was expected. Japanese manufacturing in electronics and automobiles were hard hit.

2009-07-02T10:54:00.000-07:00

AMERICA WINS LOTTERY

2009-03-25T14:19:00.000-07:00

The American Treasury has announced that the United States has won the official World Lottery. Timothy Geithner explained that the winning ticket "was secured at the IMF Bank Mega Rich Zillions Kiosk yesterday". The numbers 698720 were the first numbers with the World Mega Powerball number 13 as the clincher. President Obama said that he "didn't know" exactly where the money would go first but that there has been talk that the winnings might be split with France and that the first thing he intended to do was "retire and move to a new mansion in the carribean somewhere".

Barney Loves IT !

2009-03-17T10:10:00.000-07:00

Click the Image for a word from our sponsor - Zerotola!

2009-03-11T18:29:00.000-07:00

Webster's to redefine "Crisis"

2009-03-08T10:58:00.000-07:00

Inundated with the overuse of the word "Crisis" the Webster's Dictionary folks have decided to change the definition of the word. John Webster said the company made the decision after reading numerous headlines in newspapers and hearing too many politicians and talk show hosts abusing the term " there comes a time in overuse when it becomes a cliche' to call every little thing a crisis." he said. " We decided it was time to give that two syllables a rest so we won't hear it so much anymore. I mean, the President, the Vice President, the Secretary of State, the janitor are using the term way too much these days." The old definition of the term crisis :a condition of instability or danger, as in social, economic, political, or international affairs, leading to a decisive change will be changed. The new definition will read : Happy Time, Smiley Face in the sunshine time. A condition of rosy red cheeks and cotton candy.

Spike in families selling Children to Science

2009-03-08T10:21:00.000-07:00

The economy is so bad the Wall Street Jurinal reports a spike in families that sell their children for Science Experiments. Household children sales reached a low in the mid 90's when the economy was said to be on a roaring tear. " The Clinton economy was very rough on science" said Ed Wankel of the Children For Science Fund " Now that people are losing their jobs in record numbers we have a chance to do humanity an invaluable service " he said. There are certain disadvantages that come with selling children to science says Gina Mae, chief researcher for the WSJ " The children you sell are not the children you receive back from the laboratory. Some return with new limbs while others come back missing some. The shock is not as severe as losing your 401 k, but it's pretty bad."

New Journalism School to open !

2009-03-08T09:32:00.000-07:00

A cheerful Dan Rather spokesperson announced the opening of the Dan Rather School of Journalism in Hackensack, NJ today. "We all owe a debt of gratitude to him" the spokesperson who asked to remain anonymous said. "Dan is an inspiration to all who seek the truth" he said. The new school will have two wings dedicated to the millions of minutes Dan Rather has spent on television and radio. One kiosk will represent his many endorsements including Morley Safer and the late Jim Varney of "knowwhatImeanVern?" fame.

There will be a special "Blue Room" that is to represent all the followers of Dan in his slot on the CBS Evening News. The Katie corner will be decorated with flowers and lilies to represent her "perky nature". An entire wing will be christened "The CBS is a Bunch of Liars Wing" which will display documents showing why Mr. Rather is taking his network to court for taking him off the vaunted show 60 Minutes. The foyer will display the case against Former President Bush as well as a video documenting new font styles and how to spot them.

Obama Dumps Sebelius

2009-03-08T08:25:00.000-07:00

In a surprise move, President Obama has taken Kathleen Sebelius out of the top spot as Health and Human Services and replaced her with actor Tony Shalhoub. "Mr. Shalhoub has demonstrated an innate sensitivity to the health crises faced by America in this century" said White House Spokesman Mick E Moosteria. "With a consistent depiction of a character in keeping with the tone of the current administration, we believe Monk would strike the right posture for the health challenges we face this next four years." Mr. Moosteria said. AP reporter Blyn Guyd pointed out to the spokesman that he had referred to a fictional character rather than the actor who plays him. The White House spokesperson referred to former president Dan Quayle's remarks regarding the character Murphy Brown. "He could do it but it was stupid, when we do it, it's brilliant."

Mr. Shalhoub was first mentioned to head HHS when a recent report that cell phones in hospitals were found to be tainted with deadly bacteria.

Cell phones belonging to hospital staff were found to be tainted with bacteria -- including the drug-resistant MRSA superbug -- and may be a source of hospital-acquired infections, according to study released Friday.
Researchers from the Ondokuz Mayis University in Turkey led by Fatma Ulger tested the phones and dominant hands of 200 doctors and nurses working in hospital operating rooms and intensive care units.
Ninety-five percent of the mobile phones were contaminated with at least one type of bacteria, with the potential to cause illness ranging from minor skin irritations to deadly disease.
Nearly 35 percent carried two types of bacteria, and more than 11 percent carried three or more different species of bugs, the study found.
Most worring, one in eight of the handsets showed methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus (MRSA), a virulent strain that has emerged as a major health threat in hospitals around the world.
Only 10 percent of staff regularly cleaned their phones, even if most followed hygiene guidelines for hand washing, the study noted.
"These mobile phones could act as a reservoir of infection which may facilitate patient-to-patient transmission of bacteria in a hospital setting," the authors warned.

Universe Pictures Unveils new Horror Movie

2009-01-28T17:06:00.000-08:00

Healthy Family Found In House

2009-01-27T21:18:00.000-08:00

Authorities in Lookup, Minnesota are baffled by a surprising find, a healthy family of four actually at home at 6pm on a Tuesday. Police Lt. Diamond McDormat said he was startled by the find " I saw a light on in the front living room, knocked on the door and they were all actually there. The mom was in the kitchen cooking a full meal and the dad and his daughter and son were playing Monopoly at a table. It was really startling." The police on duty sealed the home with yellow "weirdness" tape...

MAC Downloads New Computer

2009-01-27T09:53:00.000-08:00

Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard

Koreans to Whip World's Butt in Space Race

2009-01-27T09:41:00.000-08:00

Kim Jong Il Announces Plan To Bring Moon To North Korea

New Spinning Record Set

2009-01-21T07:21:00.000-08:00

January 20, 2009.... Scientists recorded new rpm count (near 1,000 rpm) at the gravesite of former poet Robert Frost. The grave site is located in the historic district in Old Bennington Vermont. The grave site is located in the historic district in Old Bennington. The top rpm rate began at the recitation of the following words:
"...Praise song for struggle; praise song for the day. Praise song for every hand-lettered sign; The figuring it out at kitchen tables.

Some live by "Love thy neighbor as thy self."

Others by first do no harm, or take no more than you need.

What if the mightiest word is love, love beyond marital, filial, national. Love that casts a widening pool of light. Love with no need to preempt grievance.

In today's sharp sparkle, this winter air, anything can be made, any sentence begun.

On the brink, on the brim, on the cusp -- praise song for walking forward in that light..." Other than the tumbled earth found at the gravesite, the neighborhood has not changed since the Frost era.

Braving the Warming

2008-12-08T14:37:00.000-08:00

We all know the earth is warming. It's provable. If you live in the southeast United States you can try an experiment. On July 22 at approximately 4 pm, go outside and stand in the sun. You will notice a marked change from the state of the temperature of the earth from January 22 of the same year. If you mark the temperature for that time, making the notation that due to daylight saving, the hour will occur exactly one hour sooner than in the winter, the temperature will be much higher. This is global warming and proves that this is more than theory.

Remembering Diana

2008-05-25T20:57:00.000-07:00

Horrific 120-Car Pileup A Sad Reminder Of Princess Dianaâ��s Death

Miley Cyrus Pregnant

2008-04-29T07:31:00.000-07:00

Today preschooler girls of the nation gasped to learn that Miley Cyrus was pregnant by a 6 year old boy named Sklyler. "I am shocked" said one parent who was eating breakfast at the Grits N' Gits deli in downtown Pudonk, SC. "This child has been ruining the fantasies of my young-uns for weeks now and this is the last straw". In Weeblefavin Alabama there was a cd burning in which angry moms and dads sang Elvis songs and poured kegs of beer over the blaze of plastic and silicon. "I hope that girl gets a big whippin' from her achy breaky dad" said one. The question the young Disney star now faces is whether to have an abortion or put the baby up for adoption. A new reality show on A&E is being planned around the incident. "We think this will highlight the perils of teenage stardom-and pregnancy" said an A&E spokesperson.

What Number are you?

2008-04-28T17:07:00.001-07:00

data recovery

China Celebrates Disastrous Ecology

2008-04-27T17:23:00.001-07:00

China Celebrates Its Status As Worldâ��s Number One Air Polluter

WORLD DISASTER POLL !

2008-04-09T19:42:00.000-07:00

Eagle AV - Denver's Choice for Satellite

2008-03-30T11:21:00.001-07:00

Click here for the best satellite values in Colorado!

Eagle AV is Denver's best!

Weather Disasters

2008-03-28T19:50:00.000-07:00

This is the time of year when folks thoughts turn to the weather and impending disasters. This year has seen an elevation of weather related dangers, however. There have been nearly three times the number of tornadoes for a standard March already. South Carolina and North Georgia have seen much devastation. The real tornado season is quickly approaching. Stay tuned to the Disaster Channel for the reaping of the whirlwinds....

THE Latest Disaster POLITICS

2008-02-05T14:50:00.000-08:00

Probably the next biggest disaster to hit America will be man-made. I am talking about politics. There could be hours of political disaster programming. We could start with the assasination of President Lincoln, go straight to Richard Nixon and then to the Clinton- Lewinsky scandal. Political disasters of every party, color and stripe could fill hundreds of slots.

It Came From Earth ! (went into orbit and came to earth again)

2007-10-15T15:23:00.000-07:00

The most recent remake of the film Invasion of the Body Snatchers was about a space shuttle crashing to earth and bringing with it a virus. The virus mutates in space and comes to earth to create zombies. This is just science fiction, right? Yep, just like clones are. Actually, science is looking more and more like sf every day. It's been reported that microbes on satellites and space vehicles indeed are attaching themselves and mutating along for the space ride. Beware this special on The Disaster Channel - It came from space !

Housing Market a DISASTER

2007-09-05T13:06:00.000-07:00

Yet another great source for disasters is the American economy. Look at how Alan Greenspan defined the housing market "people using their homes as atm's". He was exactly right about that while all during the 1980's and 90's people saw the valuations on their homes and realestate properties skyrocketing. The big internet tech bubble of 2000 brought loads of thrills for folks in the economy as we saw the dow performing 200 point swings in days. Today the same thing is happening y et again as the Dow considers its bearing given the credit crunch from the atm that went dry finally. What a terrific place to get disastrous news from day to day. The Disaster Channel is ready, red pencils in hand to document each monetary crisis.

Hurricane Hunters

2007-08-23T10:22:00.000-07:00

Since the 07 hurricane season is now officially underway with the category 5 pounding Mexico received from Dean, it is a good time to mention a Disaster Channel special - Hurricane Hunters - Courage in Action. What a perfect disaster movie waiting to be made. A courageous group of hunters leave from Jax base only to be downed in the center of a storm with harrowing results as the plane is battered by the eyewall winds of a killer hurricane. The event would be triggered by a lightning strike which wipes out the instrumentation of the craft. This would be a meteorologist's nightmare trek with the suddenly not-so-intrepid crew that braves the storm. Hmmmmm.....

Japan Earthquake & Nuclear Threat

2007-07-17T09:11:00.000-07:00

By now everyone has seen the images of the latest earthquake in Japan. The nuclear power plant that took a hit and cans of waste spilled which had no lids on them. This story is perfectly tailored to the coverage of the Disaster Channel. Each such opportunity should be covered in-depth by reporters on the ground in time to fully keep the public abreast of the news....(this has been a DCN bulletin)

Disasters Looming in Many Sectors

2007-07-07T08:09:00.000-07:00

Now for a thumbnail of disasters brewing out there - #1 OIL - the oil producers in the world continue to tout disaster by claiming that a commodity which resides under the surface of the earth is rare. These same producers claim that they won't refine more oil since it is going to be produced using disaster #2 FOOD - such as corn and oranges and peaches and apples which will boost the price of food. The oil companies profit from ineptness which is in great supply. Disaster # 3 which is out there is Avian Influenza. This gathering storm is killing birds and people. So far the virus is having a tough time infecting people but if you check www.recombinomics.com every now and then you will see that bird flu is still very much out there and generating new strains all the time. It is only a matter of time before it clicks into the combination that seeps into the human population and takes many folks down. On this subject, the Disaster Channel would very much like to see M. Night Shamylan do a film based on the book 1918 The Great Flu. It reads very much like one of his movies yet really happened. Ongoing story #4 is Global Warming which is real but the truth is stranger than the Al Gore generated fiction. What this world needs to prevent more warming is a good old fashioned Disaster #5 VOLCANO which would put so much ash into the atmosphere that the solar rays would bounce off and chill things down a bit like they did a century or two ago. This leaves great opportunities for showings of The Perfect Storm and The Day After Tomorrow. Isn't disaster wonderful?

The DISASTER is not total

2007-06-21T13:55:00.000-07:00

The Disaster Channel would never be a disaster technically of its own. Rather it would be an HD experience with flawless execution and the tightest of all possible on-air presentation. Just as the Fox News network has changed the way graphics and sound effects interplay with each other in newscasts, the Disaster Channel would show a groundbreaking array of technical innovations to portray the look and feel of all hell breaking loose on the earth.
This would take into account the high expectations of the aging baby boomers who have witnessed the explosion of media outlets and seen technical innovation as a way of life.

A Disaster A Minute

2007-06-20T13:54:00.000-07:00

When I was a young promo director for a Fox affiliate the Fox Network produced a one-minute news update that ran in between their fledgling line-up of new shows. These provided a great thumbnail of the headlines of the day and any breaking news worth mentioning. I thought it was a great idea which meant it was doomed. The Disaster Channel would have it's own one minute break-ins covering the latest disaster happening in the world. My favorite pick for an anchor would be Dan Rather since Couric is busy at the moment. The open graphic would feature the world globe with a hurricane spinning out of control followed by a shot of a dam breaking and Britney Spears bald and any other recent disasters before lap dissolving to the anchor with the video wall of whatever the latest horrible breaking news running behind him or her. This spot would run between movies and at the top of the hour 24/7 except for when the channel would be running live on some hot story like the cyclone sweeping the Saudi oil rigs. The Disaster Minute would be a regular reminder that the world we live in is still dangerous, mudslides and all.... stay tuned

A NEW Television CHANNEL

2007-06-20T13:30:00.000-07:00

Here's A New slant on televised life - THE DISASTER CHANNEL! I imagined this years ago and now you are seeing this put down in digital format for your consideration. A 24 HOUR continuous television network devoted to disasters. Imagine being able to watch THE POSEIDON ADVENTURE, EARTHQUAKE and the latest news and history segments all devoted to disasters! This channel would include any breaking news from IRAQ , as well as films featuring Pauly Shore. Anything that qualifies as a disaster can be seen on THE DISASTER CHANNEL. Stay tuned....